YOU MIGHT BE A PASTOR IF…

You’ve waded in a creek wearing a necktie.

You’ve ever dreamed you were preaching only to waken and discover that you were.

You’d rather negotiate with terrorists than the church organist.

You see a picnic as no picnic.

You’ve ever wanted to fire the church and form a congregation search committee.

You’ve been tempted to take up an offering at a family reunion.

You’ve ever wanted to give the sound man some feedback of your own.

You’ve ever wanted to lay hands on a deacon, and you didn’t mean praying for him.

You often feel like you are herding cats instead of shepherding sheep.

Your sermons have a happy ending…everyone’s happy when it ends.

You’ve never preached on TV, because your wife made you get down before you broke something.

You feel that it is your job to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.